Bro. This is right on time. Dealing with that very issue on several fronts.
I'm five and a half decades into this thing and still tryna figure out how to be that resilient man I needed growing up. It's really hard to model behaviour that was never part of your normal as a kid. Like, my whole family life was emotional upset and various forms of violence. And wouldn't you know it, that's some of what I've passed along to my sons. And knowing that is hard; owning that is necessary. It's never too late to work on being a better human being. I mean, I might be a shitbag, but I'm like 20 per cent less shit bag today than I was two years ago. So that counts 😂
Seriously, tho, I appreciate the timing of your message--even if that scheduling is above our pay grade--and the message itself. Thank you for what ya do.
When our 4 y/o son was diagnosed with diabetes, there was more than a little "brave face" as we adjusted to the new reality.
When my mother died a year and a half ago, I didn't brave face it. Knowing they'll face the same pain someday, I felt I needed to be open in order to forewarn them. More than that, they are my closest friends, after their mother. I leaned on them and their bored me up.
Bro. This is right on time. Dealing with that very issue on several fronts.
I'm five and a half decades into this thing and still tryna figure out how to be that resilient man I needed growing up. It's really hard to model behaviour that was never part of your normal as a kid. Like, my whole family life was emotional upset and various forms of violence. And wouldn't you know it, that's some of what I've passed along to my sons. And knowing that is hard; owning that is necessary. It's never too late to work on being a better human being. I mean, I might be a shitbag, but I'm like 20 per cent less shit bag today than I was two years ago. So that counts 😂
Seriously, tho, I appreciate the timing of your message--even if that scheduling is above our pay grade--and the message itself. Thank you for what ya do.
Do you still talk to your sons?
We're going to pass along our good as well as our bad.
What's cool though, it seems, we don't necessarily stop doing that after they've left the nest.
I hope.
I know my Dad is still passing along lessons to me.
Wonderful, Dean.
How did you get to a point of self-awareness that allowed you to WANT to improve the family life you had and the one you gave your sons?
Most of us assume what we had is all there is.
Talk to them every day. Those young men are my heart and soul.
Sounds like you have already given them more than you got yourself.
Hell yeah.
'It shows that you’re human, and it’s okay to struggle.'
Yeah, agreed. Putting on an inauthentic facade is definitely counterproductive and can very well backfire.
When our 4 y/o son was diagnosed with diabetes, there was more than a little "brave face" as we adjusted to the new reality.
When my mother died a year and a half ago, I didn't brave face it. Knowing they'll face the same pain someday, I felt I needed to be open in order to forewarn them. More than that, they are my closest friends, after their mother. I leaned on them and their bored me up.
Great advice! Love your guidebook Andrew. Folks might want to know, there is a mental yoga for emotional control. https://dianekern.substack.com/p/raja-yoga