Self-Pity and Sandwiches

The Nights We Played "Statues in the Garden"

Suffering! We owe to it all that is good in us, all that gives value to life; we owe to it pity, we owe to it courage, we owe to it all the virtues.

Anatole France

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Self Pity

Well cheese and crackers what an annoying few days we’ve had. There’s still no power at the house, cell service is spotty, and it’s humid. My day to day has been interrupted and now I’m grumpy.

It’s bullshit, really. Why is it that I’m seeing power and lights on everywhere around me yet my house continues to get overlooked?

I’m not grumpy, I’m fucking frustrated.

I’m having to spend nights over at the parents’ and in In-laws just so my kids have somewhere with AC and a nightlight or two. I just want to be home. I just want to be in my own bed.

Woe is me.

My meats and my perishables are spoiled. I can’t feed my kids anything that requires perishables or meat. Hell, even gas is hard to find.

And cell service to try and check on things? Forget about it. I have to take a drive with the wife and kids in order for them to get updates on school closures and so they can preserve their streaks on Duolingo.

All of these thoughts enter my mind. In fact, I say many of them out loud.

Because I’m frustrated.

Then, when I’m lucky, I force myself and my mind to shut the front door. In order words, to hush the fudge up.

So I can think. I wasn’t thinking before, I was reacting. Feeling.

And feeling sorry for myself. Which is so dumb it hurts.

That’s like, superhero level dumb there. As though it were some superpower I had.

Dumbman. Feeler of self-pity.

There hasn’t been power for five days or so now.

And what happened? Well, on that first day I got to look like a badass because I “braved” the winds to go through some ratchet straps around my fence to keep the wind from blowing them completely down and making any repairs that much harder.

Who doesn’t like looking like a badass? Who doesn’t like being the hero?

I know I do. I used to live in the desert. The winds we had at the time I went outside were but a gentle breeze.

But they’re not normal here, so they looked awful.

Honestly, I should have hammed it up. I should have pretended to struggle with the wind in some way. Ah, but you live and you learn. I’ll do that next time.

And my children conversed with me.

A LOT!

And we played games and laughed and bitched about having to eat sandwiches over and over.

And I GOT to drive them around in the truck so they could get service, check on their friends, and do some Duolingo. Those drives were fun. We saw the results of the storm together, we flipped a ton of U-turns and three point turns trying to avoid down trees, power lines, and bad drivers.

And we TALKED.

And jammed out.

And we were together.

And oh how lucky am I to have family?

Family that does not hesitate to offer their own homes so we can have some comfort?

We would not have died or been overly put out having to stay in the powerless house those days we’ve stayed at the parents’.

But we were slightly inconvenienced.

And so they took us in and FED us, too.

I got to give my children HOT MEALS.

Wonderful!

Ya’ll know what I ate on Saturday? The second day of no power?

TWO CALZONES.

DOS.

Because my Momma loves me.

And she knows I eat a lot.

So I got two of them.

My kids ate too, probably. I wasn’t paying much attention. Did I mention how many calzones I got?

Two.

Oh, and guess what?

I learned a new game! It’s called “Statues in the Garden”.

It’s a way to keep your neighbors up when it’s dark.

So there’s on person, who is the gardener (not to be confused with kindergartener, though our kindergartener was also the gardener a few times).

The gardener has a flashlight and counts to ten.

The statues have to run around and hide or something. Then they have to try and tag the gardener.

But when the flashlight is on you or you’re illuminated in some way, you have to stop and hold still.

And so it’s basically some REALLY DAMN TERRIFYING tag variant in the pitch black of night.

And it’s hilarious and wonderful.

I prefer to start with goofy poses. You know, to put them off guard.

Anyways.

I’ve had fun with no power.

Many people are hurting right now. I am not in any mortal or existential peril, however.

So I won’t be the one to bitch anymore.

Because life is still good.

Looking back on these past few days, I realize that these temporary setbacks are just small hiccups in a much larger journey. The power will return, the fridge will be restocked, and our routines will find their rhythm again. But what won't fade are the memories we've crafted during this unexpected pause.

Perhaps this was life's subtle way of telling me to slow down and appreciate the moments that often slip by unnoticed. To put aside distractions and genuinely connect with my family. We've shared laughs by candlelight, told stories that might've remained untold, and played games that required nothing but our presence.

I was so wrapped up in my frustrations that I nearly missed the beauty unfolding around me. It's easy to focus on what's missing and overlook what's abundantly present. But gratitude has a way of changing perspectives.

I'm thankful for the chance to be the "badass" dad who braved the storm, even if it was just to secure a fence. I'm grateful for the sandwiches that became our running joke and for the two calzones that reminded me of a mother's love. I appreciate the impromptu drives that turned into mini-adventures, detours and all.

Most of all, I'm blessed to have a family that turns inconvenience into opportunity. They see a powerless house not as a void, but as a canvas for creativity and connection.

So here's to embracing the unexpected, finding joy in simplicity, and recognizing that sometimes, losing power can actually bring us closer together. Life threw a curveball, but we hit it out of the park.

No more self-pity. Just gratitude.

Because life is still good.

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