13 Comments

Wonderful analogy on life’s many choices. Thank you! My sister used this saying to move on with life and responsibility. Just don’t play cards with me because I can make you choose the card of my choice. 😉

Expand full comment
author

I love hearing about real world use cases!

This also brings up an important point about life. There are vanishingly few new ideas in the world.

The fact she used this makes me more confident in its viability.

Though I think we should still play cards.

I'd be interested to see how you would guide the game.

Expand full comment
Mar 11Liked by Andrew | Dad Explains

The difference between life and a game of cards, is that we don’t typically know the rules when we first start playing. Even the rules we’re taught, depending on our upbringing, may not be the most helpful to play the best game. Throw in the fact that different people think there are different rules, or even different games, and knowing which cards to keep and which to discard then becomes very difficult.

I appreciate that we all have choices, and that we can all choose to act differently than we have acted in the past. I think it is hard to fault people, however, when they have been playing by one set of rules, the ones they were taught, and it gets them into trouble, because everyone else is playing by a different set of rules.

Expand full comment
author

It certainly does and that's not fair nor desirable.

But let's take someone from the group that doesn't know the rules or is operating on an incorrect or obsolete rule set.

After they learn this updated ruleset they'll then have the option of moving forward with it or continue playing with the have they were originally dealt.

Understood, however, as it is written it seems as though I'm speaking on the totality of all humans ever and forever. I'm not. If someone could write a code to add an explicit "not-all" statement on everything that could require a qualifier, that would be nice. But as it stands that isn't available and attempts at qualifying every statement as such prevents engaging, fluid, and timely discussion.

So let me state for the record, some people will be the exception. Some people are never clued into the game being played as draw when they're playing stud.

Which is precisely the reason I write.

So we can get those numbers down.

People should know they have agency. Even if they've made mistakes.

Expand full comment

I agree. Agency as one of the most undervalued things that we possess. I say that as someone who has had a lot of it and realizes that I still abdicated much of it too.

What do we do in the context where it seems that the game we’re being asked to play is not actually a desirable game, and those setting the rules have typically stacked them in their favor for their on selfish benefit?

Expand full comment

Beautifully penned down - loved it!

Expand full comment

All these cowboys look like Brothers… bad hand

Expand full comment
Mar 11Liked by Andrew | Dad Explains

Welp , I needed to hear that today. Good stuff dude!

Expand full comment

I wanted to share something. After I read this post, not sure what spawned this idea, but I turned this into a physical "exercise" to pull myself out of a dark space I was in. I ripped up a piece of notebook paper to make five "cards" - if i remember correct, when i'd play poker you could only hold five at a time. Then I wrote down all the things I was holding onto. All of them were very negative so the source of my misery became apparent immediately -- my grip. Then I used more notebook paper to make more "cards" and wrote down other things in life that are beautiful and that I want in my life, I used those to make the "deck". I'll write an actual article about this breaking down what appened should someone else find it as useful as I did --- but it turned into a ritual of release, and making things translate physically from this analogy had a significant impact on me seeing how much of a part I play in my own sufferring.. so in short, THANK YOU FOR THIS POST. It was one of many events yesterday that reminded me to recommit to my relationship to God and to Life.

Expand full comment

Leaving behind is not forgetting but never underestimate the power of choice.

Expand full comment

This is a well thought out and written piece. Thank you for sharing a piece of your mind

Expand full comment