What is Marriage #2A
The second entry in a letter exchange with Von and Dad Explains.
There is nothing nobler or more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends.
Intro
First, let’s throw in some links.
What Is Marriage #1A (Dad Explains)
I strongly urge anyone that hasn’t to at minimum skim through the first two pieces considering this one is a continuation.
In his post (#1B) Von asks the question: “Is Marriage Real?”.
That’s a question that I hadn’t thought to ask as it wasn’t one that occurred to me TO ask.
Another section of note would be his example of oranges and orange-like sweet foods:
Suppose a bunch of kids are sitting around eating oranges. The oranges that they are eating are physical objects… unless they are kids in a story. But regardless, an orange is a real thing.[1]
Now let us say that they don’t know much about oranges. So when a kid comes by with a tangerine they say ‘that’s a funny orange’. And then a kid comes along with an apple and they say, “Wow, that’s a really funny orange.”
Now it is perfectly possible to have a word that includes oranges, tangerines, and apples. In English the word ‘fruit’ would do it. But that doesn’t mean that there isn’t something real that the word ‘orange’ is trying to get at. That there isn’t something real about orangeness that a scientist might describe by DNA, or a chef might describe more emotionally and practically having to do with its use in various dishes.
********
[1] If anyone is confused as to how I can call a non-physical thing a ‘real’ thing, I would recommend the Bahnsen-Stein debate, which you can find online in audio or written form. I could also recommend CS Lewis’s work ‘The Abolition of Man’. If you wish to discuss the issue further, feel free to leave a comment. Perhaps we can do another letter exchange.
This helped frame what I have today.
Which is nice.
What’s In A Name?
It turns out an awful lot is in a name. While an orange and a tangerine are similar, they’re obviously not the same thing. Could this also be applied to marriage as it is and marriage as recognized by law?
Given this seems plausible, let’s follow the thread and find out.
Marriage is a sacred covenant between a man and a woman, established and blessed by God. It is a lifelong commitment to love, honor, and support each other and represents the unity of two into one. Two imperfect people making one person that actually has a chance to be “whole”, considering children NEED the entirety of what it is to be, to live, to exist, and to thrive this point is crucial.
Marriage in the legal sense is “the state of being united to a person as spouse in a legal, consensual, and contractual relationship recognized and sanctioned by and dissolvable only by law” as we established before.
To me those definitions are vastly different.
As if we’re confusing marriage and civil unions or some other term we should be using.
Even keeping “legal marriage” solely between a man and woman should require a separate term if and because we do separate church from state.
Whether we should is a different conversation entirely.
So then I am left with this question.
If it was not called marriage in law, would gay marriage be disputed in any way?
I am excited to read what Von has to say this week. So far this discussion has helped me form a better vision of what marriage is.
Hi there,
I am truly grateful for your support and interest in my writing. It's been an amazing journey with my 'Dad Explains' Substack, and I hope you're finding value in the insights I share as I navigate this beautiful, often confusing, thing we call life.
I genuinely want my work to reach as many people as possible, and to make that happen, I've introduced a paid subscription option. Your subscription not only supports the work, but it also gives you access to exclusive content, discussions, and more - a closer look at the world through the lens of a dad trying to figure things out.
However, I understand that not everyone might be in a position to upgrade to a paid subscription at this moment. If you're facing financial constraints, or there's another reason why you can't subscribe just yet, please don't hesitate to reach out. Write to me at dad@dadexplains.life, and I'll add you on as a paid subscriber for a bit for free.
Remember, we're all in this together. Let's continue to learn, grow, and navigate this journey together.
Best,
Andrew Ussery
Dad