Preface

Write. Write until you've said everything you needed to say.

When a father gives to his son, both laugh; when a son gives to his father, both cry.

Unknown

Good Morning Dad Explains Readers,

Today we’re starting a new journey. We’re also starting a new section. This one is “Dad’s Guidebook: A Primer For Life”.

I haven’t heard back from my publisher, which is fine. The book was intended for four people. At least originally. I can find somewhere to make this into four books for me without much fuss.

But then, how to disseminate it more broadly?

Well, this Substack. The timing of Substack’s rise in popularity was fortuitous. Though not a monetary windfall, it at least allows me the chance to help others with the book if that is in the cards by providing a public outlet.

So here is the Preface. I will be putting out the first few chapters in their entirety, including the preface. After that, there will be free teasers then a paywall.

For now.

I hope you enjoy.

Love,

Dad

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Dad’ Primer For Life

Preface

I am writing this as a reference or message to my children. This is intended to be used as they grow older and in the event I am no longer able to relay the information for one reason or another.

Two years ago or so I was struck by a sobering thought. I was (from my own recollection) as old as my father was when my grandfather died. I still ask my dad for advice, and I cannot imagine how scary life looked to him having to move forward without his father’s guidance. I am not going to leave my kids with nothing.

As I write this I have no idea how the formatting or placement of concepts and sections will turn out after all is said and done, and I have no idea how long or short this will be. But I will continue writing, anyway.

Write until you’ve said everything you needed to, right? Hopefully I can present this in a way others can find answers they may need while providing my own children with everything I may want to say to them.

An impossible goal, to be sure, but one I will endeavor to complete nonetheless. I see life as a journey into the unknown. One that we don’t get to choose or opt out of. There are ways to do both, but they result in a sudden cessation of the journey itself and are not advised.

For anyone.

But along that journey we need goals to work towards. Small goals, such as taking one more step. Medium goals, like walking to the next fork in the road. Long term goals include finding a partner to share the rest of the journey with.

But there’s another category as well. Just because you accomplish a long term goal, that doesn’t mean your journey is done. There’s still much ahead of you and terrain to traverse you cannot see. Yet you must maintain goals to work towards or you stop moving.

Meta-goals are the answer. What is a meta-goal? I am certain that has been defined before by someone more learned than myself, but I am not totally sure. The vision I have of a meta-goal remains cloudy. But it could be seen as a goal to pursue throughout life that does not have the possibility of being reached.

We are often told to keep our goals realistic and I believe that’s the best path forward. Wouldn’t a meta-goal, then, be something to avoid? That’s not exactly the point of a meta-goal. The meta-goal is to give yourself a reason to keep moving forward with the bonus of a general direction to move toward.

If we just move without direction, chances are we’ll end up circling back around. Why does this happen? Who knows? But it does. So we must keep our bearings somehow. In comes a meta-goal. Or several, whatever keeps you moving forward. And that’s part of what I am working towards with this book.

One of my meta-goals is to ensure I give my kids everything they need to become and remain healthy and fulfilled adults. That’s the dream. Where is the ending there? What is the stopping point or end result? There isn’t one, so I will be working towards this end until I cannot anymore. Be it physically, mentally, or emotionally, I will be working towards understanding… everything until I have exhausted my ability to do so.

The other meta-goal? To continue to improve myself as a person, a husband, and a father to the best of my ability and to the highest point possible.

There’s not an end there either. Lucky me. And I am excited to continue to push at both of those goals for as long as I possibly can. There are a few resources we can all use in the pursuit of goals like the two above. One is the Bible. A wonderful resource, to be sure. The other is listening.

People have this astounding capacity within them to be deep and prophetic, even when shooting the shit with someone else. They don’t always mean to, but if you take the time to listen, just about everybody has something worthwhile to say. And the majority of them have many interesting things to say as well.

If you take the time to listen and listen with true curiosity and wonder you will find people are astonishingly interesting and complex. So keep your eyes open, ears sharp, and moving ever forward. You will make it through this crazy experiment called life.

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Hi there,

I am truly grateful for your support and interest in my writing. It's been an amazing journey with my 'Dad Explains' Substack, and I hope you're finding value in the insights I share as I navigate this beautiful, often confusing, thing we call life.

I genuinely want my work to reach as many people as possible, and to make that happen, I've introduced a paid subscription option. Your subscription not only supports the work, but it also gives you access to exclusive content, discussions, and more - a closer look at the world through the lens of a dad trying to figure things out.

However, I understand that not everyone might be in a position to upgrade to a paid subscription at this moment. If you're facing financial constraints, or there's another reason why you can't subscribe just yet, please don't hesitate to reach out. Write to me at dad@dadexplains.life, and I'll add you on as a paid subscriber for a bit for free.

Remember, we're all in this together. Let's continue to learn, grow, and navigate this journey together.

Best,

Andrew Ussery

Dad

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